944 S2 totalled, I am fine but lost a friend
 

My friends, I don't know if it's a good idea to go public this soon, but honestly, as I always say, I consider JW part of my family. Nerdish, I know, but it's like that after years together!

I'll make it short because I had to explain what happened so many times in the past 24 hours.

I was coming back home from Gstaad after the Bonhams Ferrari sale with this friend of mine, actually a brother for me, and my best friend since years.

Overtaking a car I lost the back of the S2. Dunno why but the road was slippery. no snow, ice or water on the tarmac, but probably a mix of salt and other shit made it slippery because when I tried to re-enter the right lane the back snapped to the left. Tried to catch it but it was too bad sadly and fishtailed. Hit the inside wall, started to slide down the opposite lane with the car perpendicular to it. An A3 was coming at speed (80 km/h speed limit there) and could barely start braking. His my car VERY hard right into the passenger door.
When I woke up and managed to breathe again I quickly noticed I was ok but not my friend. The car was as crouched as you see inthe worst pics on the net or papers on the right side..

Long story short, he was still alive there, was heliported to the hospital but he left us there.

Long story short because it's really shattering to live this thing again and again.. I spent the day with cops, telling my version, waiting for news from the H. when they came, they were terribly wrong. And when he died of course I sort of became an assassin.
Dunno how you call it in english, it's an omicide because you were not careful, something like that. When a passenger in your car dies, the justicy has to consider you like this. Now the police and tribunal will do their investigations to understand the degree of culpability I had in this thing, but well, to be honest, these are mere details today.

Yesterday I lost my best pal, the kind of friend you always think about when you do something funny, the kind of guy with whom you spend countless hours doing anything, the kind of guy that will leave an hole in my heart nothing will ever fill.

Again, I am fine, so far I can deal with it but memories keep going back to those short moments when I saw the A3 ramming into us, when I finally came back to reality and understood my friend was probably gone.

If you have questions I'll try to answer them, but please, understand yesterday was the worst day of my life, something I hope you guys will never experience in first person. Awfull, really bad.

But let me end on a positive note: life despite all this shit is worth to be lived. Even the most terrible things can happen, but we just have to keep going on, looking forward for what's coming next. I am suffering. Badly, but at the same time I realize I can't stop here and crounch on myself waiting for the pain to go. It would never go away alone. It's up to me to make it part of my soul and my life and go back to normal life asap.

Sorry for posting such depressing message like this, but if even a single member would stop for a moment, try hard to imagine how I could feel right now and maybe avoid an accident in the future, it's something good.
Even if, let me stress it, I wasn't driving like an idiot.. but still...

Be safe guys! I'll try to behave like I always did, here on JW. This is part of my life too, ence I want to deal with it (outside this topic maybe) as I always did.

Thanks

I am so sorry TT :(

I don't know what to say...

My condolances, be strong TT!

My thoughts go to you and the relatives of your best friend...!

May he RIP :cry:

Rory.

I am so sorry to hear this TT, I wish you and your friends family all the best in this difficult time.

Peter

I just hear it TT and i feel very bad for this.
I'm sorry for your big loss :cry:

My condolances, I don't really know what to say, what a bad situation, I wish you strenght and good luck through these bad days for you, and you know Jabbasworld will support you :wink: Sometimes bad things happen to good people, as long as you know it wasn't your fault, these things could happen :( :( :(

I wish you the best, keep strong !

Matteo, this is very sad news! :( I can only imagine just a tiny part of what you're feeling right now! We don't really think about it, that such horrible things can occur, when we step into our cars, but no one wants to face what you're going through right now. My condolences to his family, you and other friends!! And I wish you the strength to face the though period you're going through.

Sorry to hear about this TT, when I read the post title I thought you meant your S2 was the 'friend' that you lost.

Everybody's thoughts will be with you I am sure.

this is really bad news mate.... i'm very sorry for you, this must be like hell
my condolances for your friend! RIP

i guess there are no right words in this moment....

My condolences.

My thought go to his family and you... I hope you'll be ok.

ow shit im so sorry to hear this... my condolances on ur friend, may he rest in peace, i hope he had a good life?

Good luck with all that's coming at you now, our thoughts are with u...

so sorry to hear this. my biggest condolences. my thoughts tonight will be towards all affected by this.

thomas

I'm so sorry to hear about this TT..

You have my deepest condolances....

Thanks everybody for the warm replies. They greatly help!

He had, but at 26 he also had so many plans for his future :(

OMG :(

may your friend rest in peace; my condolences and thoughts are with you, and his family.

This is something I have in the back of my mind too when doing some of what I do. This must be the reason why the exotic cars/owners I know don't drive on salty roads... even dry salty roads. Thankfully you are ok. I lost a friend just after HS to cancer; so I know some of the same feelings... It is good you are keeping as positive as you can.

Hopefully this will never happen again to you, nor to any of our other brothers here at JW.

Damn, im so sorry for your friend and you and let him rest in piece. 26 is quite a young age :cry: . My condolences are with you and his family. I hope you will be fine :(

Very Sad. :(

I am trying to put myself in your shoes to understand the pain/guilt that you must be going through right now. You must be really feeling depressed.

From what I can read, there was nothing that you did that could be deemed negligent. It is an 'accident' in the truest sense of the word. Hopefully the police enquiry will come to the same conclusion. I assume you have a decent driving record for a couple years - that will help your case.

Lean on your family and girlfriend - their support and ours will pull you back to normal. It is gonna take time though. Have you had a chance to talk to your friend's family?

:( :( :(

TT I'm really sorry this happened to you. RIP to your friend and I hope his family is OK, despite their huge loss. :( I don't know what else to say, I hope you feel better, I know it must be tough...

Really sorry to hear that Matteo :( You're OK and it's a good thing but it's scary to think how life can change rapidly, in just a second. I was having this thought this morning when driving my car and I am sorry it happened to you :?

Keep on the positive note and all my condolence for your friend Matteo.

When read the topic title I was hoping it was the 944 you were calling your friend... Sadly not. This must be tearing you up inside... :(

Unfortunately there is nothing that I can say that will make you feel better right now. I just wish to express my deepest sympathy with you and your friends family. May your friend RIP.

Oh my! When you said we're like family, I really do feel like that too. When I read your story it made me very sad because it feels we've been friends for so long now. Keep your head up and you'll make it! May your friend rest in peace. :cry:

OMG sorry to hear this Matteo :(

I am happy that you are ok without inguries. Fingers crossed that they dont charge you for his death cause those things just can happen, this is same here with the law's but I know people who didnt have to go to prison or anything. I really hope everything will be ok!

Hard to give you any advise but dont blame yourself on this what happend, it can happen to any of us.

Be strong and we are always here for you, PM me if you need anything I can help you with.

I deeply hope in this too

Hope so to :(

Matteo, my friend, words cannot describe what I know you are going through so don’t even try to fully explain them. First let me say that you are a very strong individual for even coming to JW and explaining what happened. The loss of a friend, especially very close ones (I have lost a few to motorcycle accidents), is difficult to say the least. When it happens with you under the controls it just makes it that much harder. I know the guilt you fell must be heavy but please keep with you that you did all that you could to prevent this unfortunate incident from occurring. Whenever you feel the need to just stop what you are doing and breakdown, do it. Holding it in will just tug and your heart more and the show of emotion just further solidifies the love you had for your friend and will continue to have even in his passing.

Don't really know what to say. I was also hoping that the friend you lost was the car. I really feel for you even if I don't actually know what it's like to lose a very close friend. Just try to stay strong Matteo and hopefully you will feel better as time goes by.

/Andy.

....I lost for words............my deepest sympathies.........
Really sorry to hear about that TT, especially from you. Really sorry about the lost of your friend, may he RIP.

Wow... Really shocked to read this. :shock: It's hard to imagine that in the blink of an eye something can happen that changes your life forever...

Luckily you're okay, but really sad to hear your friend is gone... My condoleances to you and his family and I hope all will be well in the near future :(

really sorry to hear about it TT :(
loosing a close friend is like loosing half of your own life
good to know you are ok
may he RIP. :(

This may be the most inapropriet question rightnow but as it was your dream car - was all the insurance papers 944 done before the crash? i mean if all was payed and so?

Were you driving more than allowed on the road?

:shock: :( :(

I don't have any words that can sound appropriate TT.. :( :( :( :( :( :(

:| .... don't know what to say, just that I'm very sorry for your loss.
hope you can handle this along with your family, gf and friends.

:shock: holy shit... I'm so sorry TT :(
I was thinking the same as stradale, i'm really sorry man :(

sorry to hear TT.
Dont beat yourself up over it, I am sure you did everything possible.
sometimes accidents happen, its a shame they happen to great people.
my thoughts/prayers will be with you and your friend.

:(

Terribly sorry TT! Such an unfortunate accident.

My condolences to your friends family.

Sorry about the news TT. Remember that we and your family are here to support you. Even though it is just over the internet, I hope we are able to do some good.

Best wishes from all of us. Take care.

TT, sorry to hear this. Sadly this is the second such event that a life was lost while passing a car in the last 4 days. The first being a Lieutenant from my squadron, who I work with, who passed away while passing a car then losing control and rolling his car into the forest.

This has been a not so bright Christmas for both of us. Be strong, as you already display.

And let's not forget the great Clay Regazzoni who died in Italy couple of days ago.. we were talking about it with my friend this yesterday morning :(

Shouldn't be me maybe saying this, but I am luckily not prone to real depression.

Well, yes and no... behind an accident there is often a man. I could have used too much power while exiting in the opposite lane, making the wheel spin and consequentely loosing control a bit later. I maybe tried to regain my lane too quickly. I am not pessimistic at all, but just trying to say the police could conlude it was partially or totally my fault. Worst case for negligence omicide would be 3 years in jail, but can't remember now how it works and if you can have, since it would be my first time, them suspended and still be free... just need to keep in sight the worst scenario.

Yup, of course they were the second number I called after the local "911". Sadly they were not home and I didn't have their mobile.
The police managed finally to have the mobile through neighbours and when I finally had it too they were on their road already. When the news arrived about his death, I had them on the phone right away and when later, around 11 pm or midnight I was finally visited in the ER, I catched up with them at the hospital. It was important for me to see them asap and tell them about how I felt. Something you would never want to do: to look straight in the eyes of two parents that just lost their unique son, to whom they were strongly bonded, and tell them you are sorry because it was you at the wheel. For sure another thing I wouldn't wish to my worst enemy. They were destroyed as you can imagine, but we shared the pain between eachother and there was no hard feeling toward me. Could come later, who knows, but for now we are supporting eachother.

Et oui... we know it very well, but untill something strucks you like this, we tend to avoid thinking about it. And I am also sure in some months I'll find myself at the wheel of my car driving like I always did.. our brain is incredibly good at putting aside certain things.

On a side note, of course I keep seeing the accident, feeling the awfull sensation you have no control at all and you are sliding sideway (scary as hell, really), seeing my friend in the car calling my name and asking to be freed.. it's normal, and actually not SO disturbing after a while. It's a way to store this memory forever somewhere in here... but the worse moments are when you are there speaking to your girlfriend and all of a sudden you see the same scene, with her covered in blood and begging for help. And it happened with her, my mom, dad, other friends. Bizarre enough, but the thought it could happen to other ppl is as scary as the real memory.

Yup, the car was insured and of course fully paid. As for the speed. I was asked about it obviously, and I estimated some 80-90 kmh. limit was 80 kmh there. But honestly, I don't look at the speedo when overtaking of course.
I hope the driver of the car I was passing didn't said in his interviews he was driving at 100 kmh... really no idea actually.
In the future probs list I of course have the "they'll take my license obviously, but for how long?". and "what car will I drive?". I am already taking steps in finding a home for the 964 not too far from me, so I could still see it daily and maybe drive it every now and then in closed areas.
I don't want it to wait for me many long months untill I'll be able to drive it again :(

Thanks. Actually the community is already doing a lot for me by replying to this topic and just entertaining me with the usual JW stuff.

Yes, legal aspects are ok. my uncle is a lawyer and has many connections. A lawayer in the area was already contacted and will fully represent me so I won't have to do a single thing. I'll have to see him one of these days, but with Xmas coming it is a bit complicated.

Anyway, to all of you guys, THANKS! It might seem silly, but what you are doing is really warming my heart. Since 2003 I found here a real alternative home and even if I have a big and great family, I really need this little isle of friendship I can always find when opening my browser.

I know you feel there is nothing you can do to help, and indeed most of it is up to you, but again, just reading your words is really a :good: for me.

Wow TT, incredably sorry to hear the news. My condolences go out to you and the family of your good friend. I know that words cannot describe how you feel right now, and that is completely understandable. Again, I am very sorry to hear the news and my condolences go out to you and the family.

Hearing something like this really does show you how even when you are doing everything right on a road that looks perfectly OK, anything can go wrong...

Matteo,i really dont know what to say,im shocked to hear this.im so sorry this has hapened to you and my thoughts go out to your friend and his family....and of course....you

just turned my laptop on, opened JW and first I saw was your topic...

I'm speechless, very sad this happened and feel bad :(

I know, reading about being sorry that you lost your best friend must keep bringing back those black memories... May Your Best Friend Rest In Peace between all the beautifull cars up there in the heaven!!!

be strong Matteo, don't forget you have your G/F, family and JW family aswell to support you any time!!!

my condolences to You and the parents...

hope the Christmas was a bit earlier this time...
:cry:

Shocking news, after reading the topic title I imagined that by "friend" you meant the Porsche. My deepest condolence to you Matteo and the family of your friend, I can only imagine how difficult the past hours have been for you, but you must be strong.

RIP :cry:

I'm not a long term member, but my thoughts are with you TT...

OMG!

I really got shivers down my spine when I got to the point in your post about your friend passing away (thought you meant the Porsche in the title, like some others)....this is shocking. :(

THis is one of my biggest fears when out on the road, not sure how well I would handle a situation like this. Definately going to give me something to think about next time I head out for a spirited drive with a mate.

Take it easy and stay strong TT, good luck.

RIP to your friend.

Uffff, just found this.
I'm lost for words.

I can just hope that you get through this OK, Matteo ... Accident do happen and you just need to live on ... I'm sure your friend would want you to keep on going.

My deepest condolences to you, your friends familiy ...

Like Dani and RC have said, I dont know what to say in these situations. I know you had said you were looking forward to going to the ferrari sale. As soon as i started reading your post I knew it was going to be really bad. :(

I hope your family and your friends family are there to support each other through this time of sadness and loss. Im sure you will get through it Matteo. Condolences to you and his family also.

OHman that's horrible news. I came VERY close to losing a friend to a car accident in HighSchool it must feel horrible for it to actually happen.

My condolences go out to you and his family

Terrible news... I hope you're alright

I'm sorry to hear about your accident and your loss. If there is anything I can help with, please let me know. I do not know what the judicial system is over there, but if it's anything similar to here, I might be able to shed some light on what is in store.

The issue for the police will be as you said, the degree of criminal culpability you had on that day. In the US, there are varying degrees of "manslaughter" - when you take the life of another individual through negligence or an accident. Here, we have a specific charge of vehiclular manslaughter dealing with when the accident involves a car. The investigators will attempt to determine if you were "reckless" in any manner, which would count against you. The fact that you likely have a good past record will help, because in the end, the system does not want to ruin your life for a mistake. But if you past has multiple examples of you taking risks without heed for the lives of others, then they may be a bit more hard on you.

Depending on who his surviving family is, you may also be facing a civil lawsuit for the "wrongful death" of your friend. This will be civil litigation and will deal with the monetary "value" of your friend's life. The potential income he would have made had he lived, that his family would have had. The lvalue for the loss, support and companion he would have given his family, etc. This portion will be dealt with, through your auto insurance company and the type of coverage you have. If you're lucky, the family will understand that mistakes and accidents happen. In which case, the best case scenario will be that they have the financial means to continue with their lives. If they are not in that financial position, that they will proceed only against your insurance coverage. The worse case scenario is that they will proceed against your insurance, then against you personally, for additional assets, which is typically rare in the US.

Again, this is information for US laws, which may not be anything similar to your country.

I am truly sorry to hear of the loss of your friend and wish you strength in coping with the heartache and headaches to come. Again, if you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask.

:(

^I think it's a civil law system in Switzerland, which is vastly different from the common law system in our countries, especially for negligence suits.

I'm sorry for your loss, Matteo, and I offer my condolences to you and the family of your friend. It's never easy to lose a family member or friend, not least when you were there when it happened. Stay strong, and stay positive. The police will not proceed unless they have good evidence you were reckless. From what you described, it was an unfortunate, and tragic accident. Don't blame yourself.

I´m so sorry for your loss TT. I can´t even begin to imagine how you must feel. I got goosebumps from reading your story...but I´m glad you´re ok.

I send you my best wishes and condolences to you and your friend´s family.

Remember that you have the support of all the JW community. Again, I am, really sorry.

May your friend rest in peace.

Really sad to hear this :cry:

That's for sure the worst moment I remember in this community.

Be strong, man !! And remember we'll always be here !